Transmissions 
..........Activating Directional Antenna............
..........Searching for Earth.......................
..........Earth Found!..............................
..........Synchronizing Chronometers................
Chronomike = 20070131
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Transmission # = 7714641359219512365
Rotation Increment = 10:42 AM
How I Got Here
Many people have been asking how I got to this planet, and some basic facts about it. You can find the story of how I got here under About on the left menus. Here is a simple three-answer FAQ to get you started:
Was The Planet Mike named "The Planet Mike" when you got there or did you name it?
I'm still confused on this point myself. As we arrived in Lolita's spaceship, she declared with a sort of grand gesture with her paw out the window, "Welcome to The Planet Mike." She might have been pulling my leg or being metaphorical; I'm not sure. I replied, "This is The Planet Mike," but my voice went down at the end like I was making a statement instead of asking a question as I had intended. She gave me a funny look and kept flying. What I can tell you is that the natives here call it something entirely foreign and too odd to spell or pronounce. I've called it The Planet Mike for simplicity and because I don't really get it.
Does The Planet Mike have a ring?
No. The Planet Mike has never been married, and is still very single.
I still see you on Earth all the time. Are you really on another planet?
There is an impostor-me on Earth? This is the first I've heard of it! Let's run some tests on him. The next time you see him, try a karate-style swoosh of your hand to his side. If it passes through unobstructed, we'll know he's a hologram or some sort of projection. Transmit your findings here back to me. We'll get to the bottom of this, I promise.
Transmitted by Michael Bowers
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